Israel, Judaism, Modern Orthodoxy, Short Fiction, Career Guidance

Location: Israel

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

How an Israeli Prime-Minister will end the conflict

"My brothers and sisters, the people of Israel. People of the world, friends and foes. I ask for some of your time to explain some facts. Facts that are part of our history, as well as facts that are evolving now."

"For many decades, Arab Moslems surrounding us and in our midst have been attempting to kill the Jewish people. The main provocation appears to be our mere existence.
The mentality of war and destruction that our Moslem neighbors have greeted us with, has taken the Jewish people time to understand."

"By nature Jews are a peace-loving and patient people. We only fight in self-defense. Our God, who has brought us back to our ancestral homeland after two millennia of exile has been with us, defended us and fought for us in all of our battles and has insured our victory and success."

"We are here to stay. We are not leaving. We are not going anywhere else."

"We really just wanted to be left alone. You don’t have to like us. You don’t have to be friendly neighbors. But you have to stop killing us."

"But apparently you only understand facts and action."

"We have tried everything. We have tried more than any nation in the history of the world, to seek compromise, to negotiate peace in good faith. For you though, peace has only been and will only be a cynical pause to rearm and regroup for a stronger attack."

"I think though, that we finally understand the Moslem mentality. The Moslem war will not stop until they have conquered or killed all those who oppose them. There is no possibility of co-existing in peace as long as such an ideology is alive."

"The time for talking is past. Now is the time for actions and results."

"With this clear understanding of the facts, we are now better equipped to bring order to the chaotic Middle East."

"Israel will immediately expand its Sphere of Influence to enhance its defense, protection and survival."

"In addition there will be population transfers, in order to minimize conflicts within the borders of Israel proper."

"The Sphere of Influence covers the following countries:"

"Lebanon, Syria, Jordan, Saudi Arabia and Egypt."

"Following are our suggestions to the populace and the leaders. Any suggestions that are not followed will be to your detriment and the leadership will be held personally responsible."

"All Arabs in the Gaza Strip have 30 days to leave the area. Transportation will be made available to take you to Egypt."

"All Arabs in Judea and Samaria have 30 days to leave the area. Transportation will be made available to take you to Jordan."

"All Arabs in the rest of Israel have 30 days to leave the area. Transportation will be made available to take you to Lebanon."

"Any Arabs that are still in the country after 30 days will be considered criminals and terrorists and will be forcibly deported."

"To the leaders of the countries within our Sphere of Influence: Following are our list of suggestions:"

"You are to reposition your armies, troops, tanks, airplanes and all armaments on the border furthest away from Israel. This mobilization needs to commence within the next 12 hours."

"Any plane that is in the air, any missile that is pointed in our direction, and any vehicle that is in motion after 12 hours will be considered an act of aggression."

"All official and semi-official broadcasting of anti-Israel or anti-semitic rhetoric will stop within the next 3 hours. Any negative broadcast after that time will be considered an act of aggression."

"A new government in each country will be nominated. The new leader will be an individual with a public record of support and friendship towards Israel. If the new leader is not in place within 24 hours, this will be considered an act of aggression."

"The surrounding countries will welcome their new immigrants from Israel warmly and provide them with food and shelter. Any immigrant that is turned back or not cared for will be considered an act of aggression."

"While the countries around us have had various levels of venomous hate and murderous plans against us, Syria in particular has been an open supporter of terrorism against Israel and the world. Damascus has been a center for every single terrorist organization on the globe and a major exporter of death and destruction."

"In 1945, US President Roosevelt made a fateful decision. At the end of a war that he was winning, he decided that in order to spare the lives of his troops and not endanger them, it was more appropriate to annihilate an entire Japanese city, filled with countless innocent non-combatants. Women and children that had no direct role in the war were vaporized. And he did this twice."

"With a very heavy heart and with much greater justification, in the hope of bringing a lasting peace to this war-torn region, I have ordered the destruction of Damascus."

"Any of our other neighbors that do not follow our suggestions and demonstrate an act of aggression will be subject to similar results."

"The time for talk is over."


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